January 28, 2008

GN Power Poll - wk 4 - Masters of the Universe



1. Michigan State - Beast Man - does the right hand man of Skelator look familiar? Beast Man is a "man-beast who can summon most of the wild creatures of Eternia to aid Skeletor's schemes." Now replace man-beast with Sparty and equate Spartan fans to wild creatures and I think you are on to something.

2. Indiana - Trap-Jaw - "a cyborg warrior with a mechanical, sharp-toothed jaw with a deadly bite, and a robotic arm onto which he can slot a wide range of different weapons." Having Eric Gordon out the outside and DJ White on the inside gives IU the widest range of weapons in this league.

3. Purdue
- Ram-Man - "He is portrayed generally as a comical character, slow and dim-witted with an almost child-like mentality." The analogy is based mostly on looks but I asked a Hoosier fan I know and he agreed, Purdue fans are slow and dim-witted. So based on that scientific poll, I'm right.

4. Wisconsin - Skelator - pure evil and nobody likes them (or ever will). "The Evil Lords of Destruction and is the greatest threat to present day Eternia."

5. Ohio State - Cringer/Battle Cat - sometimes appear timid and weak (when facing the SEC for instance), then later is ferocious and ready to take on anybody (what I saw on Saturday vs. MN).

6. Iowa
- Evil-Lyn - read Wisconsin (above) except bigger pussies.

7. Minnesota - Man-E-Faces - A team that is lacking an identity and has a "power" that is actually useless. Can change personalities to be smart, then strong, then human but never more than one at a time.

8. Illinois - Orko - "Orko is inept, with his spells often backfiring with humorous results." Sounds like coach Weber's recent recruiting efforts.

9. Michigan - Prince Adam - the alter ego of the powerful He-Man. This analogy is rather simple... Michigan Hoops is to Prince Adam as Michigan Football is to He-Man.

10. Penn State -Mer-Man - without Claxton the Nittany Lions are like a fish out of water (?, this one is bad but there are only so many He-Man character to work with here).

11. Northwestern
- Teela - looks good, but no real abilities.

Maybe next week a GI Joe post if I feel up to it.


T-Mill said...

slow and dmiwitted? I resent that!

Anonymous said...

I love it!!! As a big fan of G.I. Joe, please share your associations. Here is a primer...Cobra Commander represents Wisconsin...they show their true colors when the pressure is on...bunch of pussys.

Neil said...


Anonymous said...

Very funny.

GI Joe would be pretty good, but if you go for Transformers, you can have Autobots one week and Decepticons the next. Just a thought. I think there's great potential for a power ranking that matches teams to bad comic strips.

Brad said...

I wonder where you got the idea for these comparasions?


Just kidding! Keep up the great work!